27 Things Every Former Fraternity Guy Knows To Be True
It’s not all Greek to you.
1. No matter how hard you try, you can’t bring yourself to throw away your old Sperrys.
2. You always had patriotic clothing for any occasion.
3. Every once in while you still crave a Keystone.
Or a Fratty Light.
4. You still own a questionable seersucker suit that you never wear.
5. Beer bonging doesn’t have the same appeal it used to.
6. You have no idea how to explain that goofy composite pic that seemed like a good idea at the time.
7. You remember wearing short shorts way before they were a thing.
Sky’s out thighs out.
8. You have a love-hate relationship with the word “frat.”
“Would you call your country a …”
9. You still get excited whenever you hear “Wagon Wheel.”
But you’re not so sure about the Darius Rucker version.
10. Looking at your old photos, you inevitably come across a cringeworthy one from a theme party…
… But still reminisce about how fun those parties were.
Universal Pictures / Via thebusinessweave.tumblr.com
11. A good portion of the shirts in your wardrobe still have logos on them…
12. … Or frockets.
13. It’s sad, but you can no longer rock croakies with a tank top after college.
14. You have a stack of elaborately decorated coolers that you never use.
15. You wish it were still socially acceptable to wear your old fraternity gear.
16. You still sometimes classify people as GDIs or geeds.
17. You’ve managed to keep in touch with most of the guys in your pledge class.
18. And have absolutely no idea how you made it through pledgeship.
19. You wonder how you got up at 6:30 a.m. for the tailgating, but still managed to miss the game.
20. You marvel at how intense you used to pre-game.
21. You have an extended vocabulary of words you no longer use.
22. You now realize that you spent a small fortune on fraternity dues.
And your wardrobe.
23. You have no idea how you lived in a disgusting house with 30 other guys.
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24. Gray New Balance’s will forever be “newbies” to you.
25. You miss the competitiveness of intramurals.
26. You’re still not willing to share your secret handshake with anyone.
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